I’m a Toy-R-Us kid.  Ok, maybe not though I am still a Barbie fan.

I’ve always believed that age is a state of mind rather than a measurement of years. The difference between now and the year I was born does not necessarily equate to how “old” I feel. Somedays its much younger – like when I’m dancing around the house to 80’s metal.

And somedays its much older – like when I’m listening to the 20-somethings in HR go mental over the power being out. Ugh! Have a juice box and sit quietly by the window until the grown-ups instruct you otherwise. Of course there are also the countless moments in any given day when I’m reminded of my physical age – a glance at silvering hair (must color soon!), the creaking of knees as I climb the stairs, or the ever present 17 year old daughter (who has the trim figure Ionce had until I met her father). 

While I know the music of Dead Mau5, Neon Trees, and Sick Puppies, apparently listening to their music and wearing concert tees only makes you feel older, not hipper. Do we even say “hip” now? Another sign!  Ugh! Gag me with an iPad – this aging thing bites!   But while my body says I have to get older and wider, I mean wiser, I think I’m going to protest the actual ‘growing up’ part a little longer.

  •  I will eat dessert before dinner and not ruin my appetite (just my waistline).
  • Driving fast is fun! The ticket and subsequent defensive driving class are heinous.
  • Adults can still play with Barbies and GI Joes and Hotwheels – its called collecting vintage toys
  • Playing in the dirt is good for you (ie gardening)
  • Grape juice is healthy. Fermented grape juice, preferably a nice chardonnay, is better.
  • I’m not gonna pay that bill or file my taxes or mow my yard and you can’t make me!
  • If kids can get candy for getting a shot at the doctor’s office, I should get a pony for my annual well-woman exam. Or at least dinner for what the doctor puts me through.

Youth is wasted on the young, but experience teaches us when to think twice, and when to break out the slip-n-slide. Tylenol and Icy Hot sold seperately.